“These are cattails, Papa!”
When we were at the Metropark, I had another one of those moments where I can see the world through our sons’ eyes. “Dang,” I thought, “Bo finds joy, somehow, wherever he is.”
And I began to contemplate, how does he do that? Bo was as happy, peaceful, and silly-seeking as he ever is finding Cattails with Mommy and chasing Dadi around a tree, on this grassy pointe we were on at this lake, on an otherwise unremarkable Saturday morning.
And I was nostalgic, perhaps even a bit jealous as I watched him, laughing and enjoying the outside.
What happens to us along the way that makes it so that such little pleasures aren’t enough?
Later that week it hit me, one day our sons will grow out of this mindset too, and it will be my fault.
As they grow, I will teach them to sacrifice for the future. I will have no choice but to. Trade one cookie now for two cookies later sort of stuff. Or, study now so you can earn a living later. Or, that kid came a long way to play here, want to help him up the slide instead of going yourself?
All the examples, and more, are ones that hold the basic structure of: invest for the future so the future can be better, it will be worth the wait.
And that point of view, will probably lead to him believing that there’s more to life than cattails, so to speak.
As part of this growing up and learning to sacrifice, he will form beliefs on what “better” and “worth the wait” are. And my big gasp came when I realized that he will learn that from me.
As he learns to make sacrifice, his perceptions of why we should sacrifice will come from me. Should it be to lift up ourselves, or lift up others? Should we always strive for more? What is valuable, money and status? Character? Nature? Family? Being popular? Faith?
My example will dramatically influence what our boys will perceive as valuable and therefore what they sacrifice for.
I hope we can live up to that responsibility. And with any luck, at my age, Bo will still find joy in little things like cattails on a sunny day at the lake.
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