Every night (almost) at dinner, Robyn and I talk about highs, lows, and proud moments*.
Heres how it works:
One us asks - “What we’re your highs, lows, and proud moments?”
That persons shares
Then we switch
This is a nice ritual for us for a few reasons:
We catch up on the day
We get to read each other’s emotional state and energy
We get to vent if we need to and move on
We get to cherish life’s sweet but little moments
But more than anything it’s a lens into our values and a check to ensure that we’re not valuing the wrong things.
For example, if I said my proud moment is “I made a lot of money today”, I’m revealing something about what I’m valuing. I’m forcing myself to say it out loud and acknowledge it.
And in that moment, I can correct myself and choose to find a different moment to be proud of that aligns with my true values instead of society’s. And that course correction retrains my brain on what I want to and should be proud of.
It’s a great reflection practice that’s very effective, but very quick and easy.
*March 16, 2020 Edit - In recent months, we’ve shifted from “what were your proud moments?” to “what did you learn today?”.
If you enjoyed this post, you'll probably like my new book - Character By Choice: Letters on Goodness, Courage, and Becoming Better on Purpose. For more details, visit https://www.neiltambe.com/CharacterByChoice.